A Second Chance
by cinnamonarabesque
Summary: What if Petunia wasn't as bitter and cold as she acted? What if someone gave her another chance at life? This is the story of a very different Petunia Evans.


**This may or may not be a one-shot depending on how much time I have. I thought of this at 10:00 last night, and didn't stop writing until 1:00. Hope you enjoy it!**

**Declaimer: I don't own anything you recognize.**

Petunia Evans-Dursley woke to silence. She was laying on a flat surface, neither cold nor warm, simply there. A small, unimportant part of her mind realized that she was dead, but the fact didn't bother her. She had been expecting it for a while. As she came into awareness, she realized that she could no longer feel the ache in her old bones that she had become so use to, and the constant, pounding headache was gone. She felt…Young. She slowly blinked her eyes open, taking in her surroundings. She was in a white space, completely alone. There was only her in this empty white world. Was this Heaven? Or Hell? Was she doomed to eternal isolation? She slowly got up and scanned the fog for any sign of life. It was so quiet that she could hear her own heartbeat.

In the distance, a flash of red appeared, moving steadily towards her. Petunia took an involuntary step back, fear making her heart rate speed up. She thought back to all the things she had done wrong in life and wondered what her punishment would be, for surely this was her doom approaching, this small, red speck in the distance. But the speck wasn't a speck at all, she realized, it was a person. As her eyes strained to pick out any distinct features, her thoughts strayed to her long dead sister, and how the red hair on this person matched her shade precisely. Her breath caught in her throat as the implications hit home.

"Impossible…" She breathed, but as the figure drew closer there was no mistaking who it was: the red hair, those almond-shaped green eyes…

Petunia stepped back in panic and briefly considered running. She wasn't ready to face her sister, not after all this time. They hadn't spoken since long since she died, and yet here she was, tormenting Petunia even from the grave.

Lily Evans-Potter stopped in front of her sister and gave her a sad smile.

"Petunia." Her voice held neither hate nor love, a feeling Petunia couldn't quite place. Curiosity? Resentment?

Petunia reached out as if to touch her, but drew her hand back at the last moment. "Lily?" She whispered, feeling an odd mix of emotions. She wasn't sure if she should be happy or afraid. "Is it...Is it really you?"

"Yes Tuney, it's me." Lily paused, as if searching for the right words to say. "James didn't want me to come, but I had to. I've waited a long time to see you, to speak to again."

Speak to her? But why? Petunia intended to ask her just that, but different words came out of her mouth. "Where am I?"

Lily looked around the white space, before turning back to her sister. "It's a sort of purgatory, where it's decided where you should go." Her expression was uncertain as silence fell over the pair again. After years of being apart, there was just nothing to say.

Lily opened her mouth as if to say something before snapping it closed.

"What is it?" Petunia asked gently, as if worried that the moment would shatter if she raised her voice above a whisper.

"Look, I understood that you hated me," Lily blurted suddenly, waving off Petunia when she opened her mouth to protest, "But why take it out on my son? Why take it out on an innocent, orphaned child who had done no wrong?" Behind the anger, there was open curiosity in her voice.

Petunia sighed, running a hand through her hair. This was a question she had often tried to answer herself many times. She had always kept it at the back of her mind, but now, with her sister standing in front of her, she was forced to acknowledge what she had kept hidden for so long.

"Oh Lily, I never hated you." She said quietly.

Lily stared at her, her brow furrowed. "But why then? Why would you shut me out? You were always so _cold_ to me, like I wasn't worth your time. I just assumed-" She broke off and Petunia opened her mouth to respond.

"I was _Jealous_ of you Lily!" She exclaimed, ashamed at having to admit her most well kept secret. "Yes, _Jealous_. You were perfect. Amazing. Pretty, intelligent, funny, you were everything that I wasn't. Nice to everyone, loved by everyone, with guys practically throwing themselves at your feet while I was forced to marry Vernon!" She spat the name with disgust.

Lily mouth was open in an 'O' of shock as the truth spilled out of her sister like dirty water.

"You were my little sister," Petunia continued, "You weren't supposed to be better than me. And then you got your Hogwarts letter and you left me all alone. You came back in the summer and it was like you didn't need me anymore, like I didn't matter. Oh, and I was _angry_, angry at the world that stole you away from me. And you grew more and more distant. You had friends that loved you and you could do _magic_! And what did I have? Nothing! I was desperate for something normal, someone that made me feel special like the man you married. Vernon was obsessed with being normal like me, and when I was around him I could forget about you and the wonderful world that you were a part of, but I wasn't happy, no, far from happy. Vernon was an unpleasent and vicious man." She laughed bitterly, "Someone just like me."

Lily looked at her like she wanted to interrupt, but Petunia wasn't finished. The dam had been broken, and she wouldn't stop until all of the truth was out. What was the point of holding back anymore? She had nothing left to cling to except her sister, and the least she could do is try to make her stay.

"Dudley was born, and I tried to give him the life I never had. I failed, obviously." Petunia said with a humorless smile, "That hit me the hardest. My biggest defeat, worse even than losing you. I loved him, doted on him; I gave him everything he asked for! But it wasn't enough. He grew up a bully. All this time I thought of you. I kept telling myself that one day I would apologize to you, and we would make up and things would get better. I would leave Vernon and we would be friends, like true sisters should be. Then you died." Her voice broke and she took a deep breath in an attempt to calm herself, but despite her efforts her eyes were suspiciously bright. Eventually she continued, "You died, and it was like all hope was lost. I had been counting on making up with you. You were that one glimmer of hope in the distance, and then you were gone. That was the day I lost any reason to live, and that was also the day your son was placed upon my doorstep." She paused, wondering if she should continue. Lily saw her hesitation and put a hand on her shoulder, giving her an encouraging almost-smile.

"I messed things up again! Oh god Lily, I just keep messing things up again and again, and every time I try to make things better, they just get worse!" She cried, almost hysterical. Taking another deep, calming breath, she continued. "I saw you in Harry. Every time I looked in his eyes, I saw _you_, and I hated it. I took out years of frustration on him, from always being second best, from all of the bitter disappointments that made up my life. Marrying Vernon, Dudley, _all of it_." She angrily wiped away the tears of guilt that had sprung into her eyes, "And he just _took_ it! Everything I did, he just kept trying to make things better, make me approve of him. He was so sweet and pure and-and _kind_. And me? I took some sort of sick pleasure in watching someone else feel unwanted. Like the monster I am."

Lily's eyes were wide as she watched her sister, "Oh Tuney…"

"No!" Petunia cried, yanking away, "I thought it was you I hated. You, magic, anything abnormal, but I didn't realize that what I really hated was myself, and that terrified me. I hated myself for what I did you you and your son. I hated myself for creating what Dudley is today, and every time I looked in the mirror I was disgusted by what I saw. What I had become." Her face was a mask of despair as she stared at Lily as if her life depended on it. The tears were flowing freely now, streaming down her face. She was breathing in gasps as she struggled to continue. "A CRUEL, BITTER, JEALOUS SHELL OF A WOMAN!" She screamed through her tears. "And now it's too late to fix things. I had a chance and I blew it." Her voice trembled, "You hate me, and Harry hates me, and Dudley would hate me if he knew what I had done to him!"

Lily threw her arms around her sister, and Petunia sobbed in her arms. "oh Tuney," Lily whispered, "Tuney."

"I'm so sorry!" Petunia whimpered, shaking.

"I don't hate you." Lily said as Petunia slowly calmed down. The girl in her arms blinked at her in confusion. How could her sister forgive her after everything she had told her? "I could never hate you. All this time I thought you hated me, and I didn't know what I had done wrong."

Petunia drew away from her, shaking her head. "You've done nothing wrong, it was me all along." She wiped her eyes, her face downcast. "I would give anything to turn back the clock. I wish we could have grown up together as friends."

"That's part of the reason why I came. Tuney… you can. You can go back and relive your life."

Petunia stared at Lily, dumbfounded. "I – I can?"

Lily nodded, still smiling, "If you want to, you can start over. Relive your life and fix all of the mistakes you made. It's not to late!"

She could only stare at Lily, mouth open in shock. To relive her life was more than she could ever have hoped for.

"Yes! Please! I – thank you, Lily."

Lily engulfed her in a tight hug before drawing away. "I knew you would say yes!" She pulled out a handful of sparkling gold dust. "Goodbye Petunia." She said before throwing the handful of dust over Petunia's head. As the dust settled on her skin, Petunia took one last look at her sister.

"I love you, Lily." She said, and as darkness overtook her, she thought she heard Lily's voice call back,

"I love you!"

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Years later…

The sun shone on the scarlet steam engine at platform 9 and ¾. The sound of excited chatter filled the air as parent and children all around said their goodbyes. At the center of the crowd stood two sisters, one magical and one muggle, but unbeknownst to the witch, her sister stood at crossroads in time, the exact point in the original timeline where Petunia had truly cut all ties with her sister. However, this time things would be different. This time, the air wasn't tense with a strained relationship that had festered with years of silence. This time, Petunia and Lily Evans would part as friends.

"I'm going to miss you!" Lily said as she hugged her sister.

Petunia smiled and squeezed Lily tightly to her, "Not as much as I'll miss you! What will I do all alone?"

Lily laughed, "I'm sure you'll find something."

"Now go on!" Petunia said, pulling away to push her sister towards the train, "You're going to miss the train!"

Lily hugged her sister one last time before running towards the steam engine as the whistle went off.

Petunia watched her sister go with a sad yet comforted smile. This time, things would be different. She had been given a second chance, and she would not fail.


End file.
